Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Lowering my numbers

I posted this on my blog but I felt that it belonged here too. I'll make it short because I don't want to make you read this twice.

I now have a real health reason to be eating healthy and exercising daily. Not just a I want to lose weight and look good reason. Now it's a I need to bring down my cholesterol without drugs reason. I really hated the way I felt on those Statin drugs. I was tired, sluggish, jelly-legged, muscle achey and just generally weird. Now that I am off the drugs I feel much better and I want to say that way.

Making the best food choices that I can (this F*ing Agreement) is now more important than ever. Easing up on the bread and getting more fiber is now a priority. Oatmeal in the morning, salads and veggie soups for lunch and more veggies for dinner is now the focus. Health is now the important thing.

Diet and exercise. Here we go again.

Monday, February 23, 2009

I'm here Barely!

My goal is to do a little more each day this week. My goal is to record at least one meal a day this week. My goal is to try and push myself just a bit more each day, in hopes that these aches and pains will be worked out by the end of the week. My goal is to go grocery shopping this Friday with the kids help.

I honest to goodness don't know how Laura managed to survive this last year. I really don't. I don't know how she managed to pick herself up each day and try to make it a better day...And that's what I have been thinking about these past few days as I lay in bed hurting/aching and at times just saying kill me now to put me out of my misery. And then saying no if Laura made it so can I..And then Kill me now..LOL...

I hope you are all well..And getting excited for your reunion!

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Not feeling like myself

My weight is up and my exercise is non-existent. I have been feeling like crap lately and my energy level is screwed. My doctor upped my blood pressure medicine and has also added some cholesterol meds too. I just don't feel right. My blood pressure has been all over the map. First up, then down, then up and then way down. I have a call into my doctor. Maybe we will screw around with my meds.

Laura asked if anyone was in this fucking agreement anymore and I guess that's my cue to get back in. I just wish I felt better.

My weight this morning is 155.5 OMG!!

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Small Improvement

My eating is a little better. Not great, but better.

I did go to exercise class yesterday morning (lots of people there... unusual... because of President's Day). I'll go again tonight.

There is no class tomorrow; Ann is joining Richard at an appearance at a Middle School, and I don't have the fortitude to get up early enough for a 9:30 am class taught by Michelle.

The scale was up three pounds as a result of crazy eating last week including a whole package of York Peppermint Patties on Thursday, A huge Valentines Day Dinner with cheesecake for dessert on Saturday, and a whole package of Blueberry Muffins on Sunday. Despite all of that, after only one day of sane eating (yesterday), it dropped right back to 155 again.

Note to self: some of the eating was stress induced, but as it turns out, I AM going into menopause finally, and I got my cycle a week early. The chocolate was probably a woman thing. That's probably why it appears I'm getting away with it, but let's not push the envelope.

Giving Cosmos IVs is really hard. He really screams and crys. I hope I get better at giving them; I hope he gets better at taking them.

I"m going to go take Sunny for a walk right now before it starts to rain again. Then I'm going to get to work on Sue's necklace repair. I only have a couple of hours to get it done.


Monday, February 16, 2009


I have a +1.3 lb gain this week. I thought it would be worse. No recording of food since grandpa passed. Got to nip it in the bud..Tried to make the best choices, as husband stepped up and was making or purchasing stuff for meals these last almost two weeks. I'm going to make an effort to record my food again this week. I gotta get back on track. My family needs me well. Nothing gets done if I'm not.

My muscles ache, joints ache, from tensing up in bed at night. Not even aware I'm doing it. Gotta change this around. hubby wants me to go to dr. but I keep holding out.

I've cried in the shower, cried when grandma tried to give me grandpa's most prized possession (his watch)today. I'm fowarding the watch on to my mother. (Read I know I'll get it back one day)

I'm tired. I'm sleeping almost 8-12 hours a day depending on what's happened.

The funeral was last week.

I come here to read when I can. Sorry you girls are going through your individual troubles right now..Wish I could be more help to you.

My laptop blew up last week, trying to order a new one for me this week. (Read so I can read the blogs, and post to my own again)

I think of you all often..NEVER GIVE UP GIRLS!!! Never...I wish I could be there to give you hugs..KNOW That you are all worth it!!!You are the bombs!!!You are the FABULOUS FABBIES!!

Out of Control

My eating has been horrible for over a week now. I know it's stress induced, but I'm not doing anybody any good by going on like this.

Just for today, I'm going to try and make good choices. I may eat junk, but I will concentrate on having good meals too. I need to get back into a regular groove of eating. I need to try and take control of my life back, even with the new order.

I repeat. I am not doing anybody any good by eating the way I've been eating for the last week.

I wonder if anybody is participating in the Fucking Agreement anymore?

Sunday, February 8, 2009


With the stress of my boys being sick, I seem to have eaten myself into a bit of a diabetes attack. At least I hope that's all it is.

Eaten fairly well today although a bit too much on the carbohydrate side. Still feeling symptoms.

I wonder how long it will take for all that sugar to leave my system? Or for me to figure out that this is not diabetes after all.


Wednesday, February 4, 2009

What Next?

So I've been exercising six days a week for a month now. Apparently, aside from the physical benefits that I've been reaping, and also a good case of "I'm tired, but it's exercise fatigue and not because I"m sick," Eric has been noticing.

Yesterday, he told me that he had been getting onto his treadmill. I was thrilled.

Then, today, I called him around 6 PM just to say "hi." He couldn't talk to me. He, Garrett, and Miles were in the middle of a Wii Fit contest!

I can live with that.

Monday, February 2, 2009

Half Way!

How has the F*ing Agreement helped me??? Let me count the ways.

I can't explain the psychological effect you girls have on me...Not to mention your words of comfort, encouragement and support.

And it seems to have motivated me more that I want to have more of this weight off A) for a healthier me B) there is less of me when I fly back to LA whenever that is.

The following has happened for the month of January:
  • loss of 10 1/2 inches over body parts that seemed so stagnant and not willing to give up those inches.
  • I hit a couple of emotional set backs, but dusted myself off and got back into the groove.
  • down one size in jeans as of Saturday. And after trying on some shirts, if losing a little more off my biceps I'll be in a Large. (Something I have not seen since High School)
  • I have met my 20% goal of body weight lost and have 5 lbs left to make my 30% goal.
  • I have hit and gone past my half way body weight marker. (I have lost more than I have left to lose)
  • I lost 14.50 lbs for the month and know that no other month this year will top this month, but I'm gonna give it a shot.
  • Pictures for February posted on my other blog.

I'm still feeling a bit weak, but hope that this next month I can amp up my exercise portion of my program. I bought some new tapes..Different from what Richard does. Don't know if I will like them as well, but he has encouraged us to try new and different workouts and that's what I aim to do.

Onward and downward

Yes, Laura. I'm in again. I love having this Fucking Agreement. It helped me in January so I'm in for February. Some of the ways having this agreement in place has helped me are as follows:

1) I've filled out food sheets for the first time
2) I think about this agreement before I eat
3) I've been eating much healthier breakfasts including
oatmeal and protein shakes instead of just bagels
4) Lunches have been more thoughtful
5) I've been eating more salads
6) I've been passing by the bakery isle without stopping

I still need to pay attention to what I am doing and eating which is where this Fucking Agreement comes in so I am glad we are in for another month.

Here's to a great February for all of us.

Love ya,

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Fucking Agreement, February 2009

OK Gals, we've passed out of January and the Fucking Agreement is over. Now it is February. Are you willing to agree again?

I know that I got something out of the agreement in January. I was a long way from perfect, but thanks to you-all I achieved the following:

1. Bread has been taken out of my daily diet.
2. I've exercised on a regular basis.
3. I've added some more vegetables back into my diet.
4. I've reduced the number of times I've eaten out.
5. I started keeping food sheets again.

So, the rules have not changed. There are no rules. We don't have to follow any particluar program. We are not mandated to eat at certain times, exercise at a certain level, or even give testimonials about how we're doing. We don't even have to do well at whatever program we decide to follow. All we have to do is Fucking Agree to do the best we can under our current living circumstances.

If we're sick, if we're injured, we understand that may limit our ability to be healthy. If we have family crisis, we only agree to try to think out our choices so that we don't regret not considering the options. We don't even have to follow through. For thinking about it this month may lead to action later on.

Are you in? Wanna Fucking Agree with me?